Back in the DR

I know these blogs get long. And I’m way behind. So at least I’ve broken them up into some major topics. Getting access to the internet has been extremely challenging. I am settle in the DR (Rio San Juan). But, don’t have internet at my house, so it’s much harder to communicate. I did finally get my email working on the local PC, so hopefully I’ll be able to write and read emails at my house, and send/receive when I’m near a wireless connection. Thanks for keeping me in your thoughts and prayers. Things are going well.

I have had a good time so far. Not met my new Marsil and Paul yet, and may never again. Still, it’s been good. (See below an update of my old Marsil Paul)

So, by blog topic, at least you can choose what (if any) you want to read. God speed and blessings to you all.

My Last Blog - "Go With God"

….Well, at least for this trip, my last blog. Moments like this you feel like you should have something really profound to say. You feel like you should be so much more enlightened, so much smarter… but here’s the secret. I’m not. Not really.

But, it wasn’t enlightenment that I was pursuing.

What I was pursuing is the place in this world that was mine, for just that (a) moment. A special place reserved only for me. And that’s probably the pursuit I’ll have for the next phase, and the next, and the next.

I saw so much; experienced things beyond description; loved in ways I never did before. I saw so much that is true; so much that is false. And I pursue both. Gold and fool’s gold

I wish I could say that my adventure here was without bad choices. But it wasn’t. I can’t run from my faults. I can’t run from being human. So, for those of you that are looking for that person to put up on a hill and commend for outstanding performance, I respectfully withdraw my name from consideration. I only say by God’s grace…..

What did I learn? Maybe nothing new, maybe just reinforcement of things God has already shown. If I want to make a difference in this world, I have to give my heart to the cause. And sometimes giving my heart comes without choice or even noticing that my heart is being given away. But for the people I’ve met, I do leave part of my heart here. And for you that want to make a difference, I think you too must leave your heart where you want to make a difference. No heart, no difference it seems.

I will not forget the moment when my Mom hugged me as I was leaving Miami in August to come here. I had no clue what I was doing. No clue what was going to happen. Feeling so empty of those that I left behind. And, just beyond that door (I couldn’t see) was this amazing adventure waiting for me.

Mom’s last words as I left, through her tears and mine, “Go with God”. And as you read the words on a page I’m guessing the meaning and intensity is somewhat lost, but those words have stuck with me throughout this journey. And what better words. And what better testimony to God. That through it all, the good and bad, God was there. Correcting, supporting, inviting, protecting, loving, and even disciplining.

So, the journey was one of God I hope. Not me. Not by my invitation, but His. Not because of who I am, but inspite of who I am. And I hope that anyone He’s calling, they’ll understand that it truly takes nothing special. Actually, it’s the opposite. It takes the ordinary and insignificant for God to make special. And that’s exactly what happened. It was insignificant and ordinary, and God made it incredibly special and extraordinary.

I’m writing this last blog on this deserted beach with my laptop computer. It is possibly one of the most beautiful beaches you’d ever see. Truly almost perfect. Palm trees hanging over the water; gentle breeze; big waves crashing on the rock; white sand, a slight curve to the alcove. Long and beautiful sand. Streams of fresh water coming from the mountains to the sea. The sun setting in the distance. Impossible to completely describe. But it’s really here; places like this really do exist. And in case it’s hard to imagine, I happened to have my camera, so here are the pictures. (at the bottom of this blog) And who’s on this beach?? No one, except me. Only one soul. A spot reserved for this moment, just for me. To finish my blog. It’s a perfect ending to this journey. Perfect.

I want you to know that I so much appreciate you letters, comments, and prayers. And even those the words on this page seem distant, please know your names and words and emails came to mind many times during this journey. They were fresh water to my soul. I know I didn’t make this trip alone. I know there were many joining me in many ways. And thanks for taking the journey with me. It would not have been the same without you.

And thank you God for this journey. I pray we all honored you with this journey.

Thanksgiving Pics

Me, to my left Tammie Wallace (Brian's in Guatemala studying Spanish), Laura Beth and Corey Lamb, in back TJ & Holly McCloud.




Not my best shot, but then again, not my best Thanksgiving meal. But very Thankful none the less!





The crew in Santo Domingo, in "Zona Colonial"

Two Weeks And Counting

This may be my next to the last entry. I was updating weekly, but news has become routine, so not much to blog about.

For Thanksgiving, the missionaries got together in a resort town called Caberete and enjoyed good times together. I have spent Thanksgivings in many places, but this probably felt less like Thanksgiving than any other place. I guess because we mostly had burgers and salads on the beach instead of traditional stuff. I did get the “Thanksgiving” special, but it wasn’t quite like you probably had.

We then headed to Santo Domingo for the weekend. It was good to spend the time with the missionaries, and learn more about the most significant (largest/capital) city here (supposedly 2.25M people). Christopher Columbus had a huge impact here. And, many things in Santo Domingo are the oldest in the “America’s”. Really interesting.

My Santiago family is doing well. But, now that I’m spending more time in Rio San Juan, we’re definitely in a pulling away mode. But, I think that’s good in the long run, for all of us. They’re getting more use to me not being around as much; and vice versa. It’s something we all knew had to come, but it’s not so easy.

I’ve been averaging about half my time in Rio San Juan which is were the missionary teams are. It’s certainly different than Santiago. No fast food; no American food, no grocery stores or anything else to speak of. No place to call my own. But, the folks here are great and warm, and I enjoy being around them. Any time I’m around people that seem to have given up everything to serve, they impress me.

Many people are asking if I’ve learned Spanish or how the Spanish is going. And to be honest, the questions (if I can be honest) get trying, because learning a language is extremely difficult to explain; and everyone learns at a different pace, and you don’t wake up one day and you’ve “learned” a language. All things I’ve learned since I started studying Spanish. There are days I understand what I consider a lot; and other days I think I’ve learned nothing. And, if you’ve never tried to really learn another language, there’s no real reference point. At least that was the case for me. Trying to learn a foreign language has made me so much more sympathetic to foreigners living outside their own country, trying to adjust to culture, language, and life in a new country. I’ve had it relatively easy compared to most others, but there are still days when I wonder what in the world am I doing. Another reason missionaries are so impressive to me.

Three months have passed. I’ve learned so much. And, as usual, learned I know so little. And, wonder what I’ve really learned and how best to use that knowledge. I could talk for days about culture and trying to understand where people are coming from and then try to know how to really help them. I am surrounded by people in need; we live in a dying world, but knowing how to help is really really challenging. Some things I thought of before I got here…. Just not so sure any more.

If I look back and see all the “stuff” I’ve been involved with, I’d have to say that adults really rarely change. True for myself (regrettably) true for others. Children can have remarkable changes, it seems. And often do. But what exactly that means for me personally, not sure. I think it means I’m planning to move more cautiously into the next phase of whatever my life brings. You start out wide eyed, and ignorant and ready to conquer the world. You end up with more knowledge (hopefully), more questions, and more understanding but also wondering what part of the world you want to tackle, and why. When you end up with choices, lots and lots of choices, choosing gets really hard. I don’t want to be a spectator sitting in the stands, but I also don’t want to be fighting for something that’s not worth fighting for.

I believe the answers lie in wisdom and I believe wisdom comes from God and I believe my receiving wisdom is based on faith. So, I’m hoping for a mustard seed of faith.

Is This the Same Kid

I've got an all points bulletin out for the kid I first met here when I arrived in the DR. His name is Paul and I seem to be missing him. There is a kid here living in this house that goes by Paul, looks like Paul, sounds like Paul, and sleeps in Paul's bed, but I'm pretty sure it's not Paul.

The Paul I met when I got here was allllll about Paul. His every waking thought seemed to be about Paul. And it almost drove me crazy.

But, this kid that lives in this house now and goes by the name "Paul" doesn't even remind me of the other kid. Here's the story.... (long and blah blah)

I started an "earn your allowance" program. Similar to a program my parents did when I was young; I give Marsil and Paul each $7.5 USD in dominations of 5 pesos coins (which is a total of 250 pesos; 50 coins), at the beginning of the week (a HUGE amount of money for a kid in the DR;which really concerned me). However, each time there is a violation of a house/family rule, or misbehavior, or something that needs correcting, I take away pesos. Mostly at 5 peso increments, but up to 20 pesos at a time, based on the issue. At the end of the week, whatever money they (Paul and Marsil) have left, that's their allowance for that week, and it starts over again every week. At the end of this past week, Paul and Marsil got their first payment. Paul earned 155 pesos (lost 95 pesos), out of a possible 250 pesos. Marsil's was 185 pesos (lost 65 pesos), out of a possible 250 pesos.

After I gave them the money last night, I gave them a long (and probably boring) talk about how God blesses. How he's blessed them. How God has blessed me. How I believe God calls me to help others, and blesses me (in many ways) even more when I do help. I challenged them to consider giving a part of their allowance to someone, and do it in God's name. It could be church, a person in need, anyone they felt needed encouraging. And, this was strickly optional; voluntary. It was not a requirement or a rule; it was suggestion to merely show how they recognized God's blessing and their desire to bless others, as God has them. And, through it all, they had smirks on their faces and half laughing (typical reactions of a 12 and 15 year old), but I got through the "talk" and let it go. Hoping they heard a little of it for future reference.

We then headed to the store 'cause the money is burning a hole in their pockets (like me at their age). And I'm expecting candy, and cartoon magazines, and junk for themselves, right?? That's what I would have done; that's that I DID do when I was their age. We get to the store, and Marsil, instead of junk, buys basically school supplies!!! And spends ALL his money. He did buy some candy, but it was for his brother!!! Okay, I'm confused. But not surprised, because it's Marsil and that's typical impressive Marsil. But, the story gets better....

Paul has been talking about a magazine he's wanted to buy. And has looked forward to buying it all week. Mentioning it to me several times; his plans to buy this Pokemon magazine. He goes to get it at the store; thumbs through it and then asks me a question. "Norm, I need your advice, would you buy this magazine if you were me?" Hard question! For one, cartoons were never my bag and I'm 43. 12 years old was a long time ago. I basically say all that, and tell him that I really think it needs to be his decision. He mills it over for like 5 minutes.

By now Marsil is getting anxious to leave the store; he has his stuff and is ready to head to the check out. Then, all the sudden, Paul puts down the magazine and goes over and gets a little plastic dump truck. Like a toy suitable for a 5 year old, not Paul. And out of ear shot, Marsil starts making fun of him. I immediately correct Marsil telling him it's VERY wrong of him to judge how Paul spends his money. It's Paul's money; he can spend it any way he likes. (this, all out of ear shot of Paul). I'm thinking to myself it's a bit childish, but it's truly Paul's choice. Paul does buy the truck. Marsil still snickers behind his back.

We pay for it all and head out of the store. As we're leaving, Paul asks me to pull close to the parking attendant, and Paul proceeds to give the attendant some change. The attendant gladly accepts the change. (I'm thinking, okay, this is Paul's way of giving back. A good start.) Then, we get to a street corner, and a lady is begging, and Paul then gives some of the candy that Marsil had given him, to the lady. Okay, I'm now impressed. And I'm thinking where did the old Paul go??? First the monopoly game (read early post), now this!

BUT then.... Paul asks for the phone number of our housekeeper, Nigrita. Keep in mind Nigrita is making like around $120 US per month; very poor. I tell him I doubt she has a phone; she's very poor. Not only a poor family but has a young son of about 5 years old. I begin to put the picture together (at least, so I think). But, before I do, Paul asks, "Norm, if I do something good, do I have to tell you??" I tell him, if he does it in secret for the right reasons, then no he doesn't have to tell me. But, if he does it in secret because he knows it not being who God wants, then that's not a good reason for a secret. He's quiet the rest of the way home. That was last night.

Fast forward 24 hours. Tonight, at "family time", I ask Paul if he's decided on any more ways of sharing, thinking about the dump truck and pretty sure (but not certain) he bought it for the housekeeper's son. (Still thinking I have him figured out!) He tells me he knows I know his plans. I ask him to tell me and Marsil his plans anyway.

Paul proceeds to tell me he did talk with the housekeeper this afternoon (while I was gone) and gave the dump truck to her, for her little boy (about 5 years old). Paul tells me that Nigrita shared with him that her son is not doing well in school and is having other problems.

Paul tells Nigrita that he'll make a deal with her son..... If her son's behavior improves, each week he (Paul) will buy her son a special gift!!! This is all coming from a 12 year old boy named Paul!!

Seriously I'm about to fall out of my chair as he's telling me this story. Rarely have I seen anything like it. And perhaps it's just a short lived jesture (I hope not), but it's one of the most incredible things I've seen from any 12 year old. I ask him, where in the world did he get the idea to help her son. And he tells me, "From you Norm. If we do good, we get our money at the end of the week; I'm doing the same for Nigrita's son".

I have to confess the tears start rolling down my eyes. I have no idea if this blog can even begin to describe the scene. But this boy of 12 is showing me and his brother Marsil how to give. Marsil is now speechless himself. He now realizes the dump truck he made fun of Paul for buying was NEVER for Paul! I turn to Marsil and ask him what he thinks about all this. I see something in Marsil's eyes I don't think I've seen before. His is truly truly proud of his brother. (speechless and proud, for once).

I tell them both how extremely proud I am of them and how they've grown so much in two short months. Paul, for this season, has literally changed his life (and a little of mine). The former whiny, apparently self centered little boy has vanished. In his place is this incredibly generous kid. Still only 12, with all the perks and problems, but perhaps one of the most generous kids I've ever met at 12 years old.

Instead of buying anything at the store for himself, he ends up only buying something for Nigrita's son. Touching this kid's life. And, offering to help him in the future.

So for all you prayer warriors out there that have lifted Paul up. Please know that God has answered your prayers. In perhaps one of the most dramatic changes I've ever seen.

I could freak out about wondering if it will last. If they'll be different when I'm gone. But, I'm going to rest in knowing it was God, NOT Norm, that blessed and changed Paul heart, and He is still on the throne and will prayerfully continue to change Paul's heart, and mine.

Kids Playing MONOPOLY

What Would I Give Up That Means A Lot to Me

I guess it's been 9 weeks. I've not written maybe because a lot of what I'm experiencing is new, but old. New in a way, but not news worthy. But, after two weeks of not writing, there are a few things.

Name 5 words you don't want to hear while in a 3rd world country. Any guesses.... Answer is.... "you need a root canal". Yep, after faithful trips to the dentist before I left the states, and somewhat frequent checkups, an embedded cavity somehow missed the radar screen. And, then I had the challenge of finding a dentist that spoke English; felt comfortable with; agreed with his diagnosis, and proceeded with the procedure. As it turns out, that all went fine, as God would direct (claro). It did take 5 trips, including the dentist and the oral surgeon, but I think it's all fixed now. And, the advantage to a root canal here is that it's about 25% of the cost it would have been in the US. So a blessing in disguise, financially.

Another blessing. It has been 2 months with no warm water to shower. And, while the weather was extremely hot, that wasn't a huge problem, mostly just made for very quick showers. But, just before the tropical storm hit (btw, everything's fine, no problems, etc.), it got much cooler, and I was thinking warm water would really really be nice to shower in. Well, God provided. On the very day I decided that I was going to fix the "instant hot" that was already installed in the shower, but had not worked since I arrived, Nidia (home host) got it fixed. Without me prompting or asking (as God provides). But, I don't know it's fixed, so I announced to Marsil we were going to fix the warm water shower unit, and he announces to me it was fixed the day before! My only question was "when were you going to tell me!" Since then it has been soooo nice to have warm water. Not hot mind you, but not cool, quite adequate. A huge blessing. I've decided as an "American", I value at least three things. Electricity, A/C (at least in the car), and hot water.

And to address the A/C, I decided I was going to rent a car for the remainder of my stay. Not just for the a/c; that was one of many reasons. And I've done just that. It has made experiencing the country and getting around so much easier. It's a huge luxury for a Dominican to have a car, but something we take for granted. I didn't miss driving (still don't), but I did miss hopping in the car whenever I wanted to go somewhere; and I missed car A/C at 3:00 in the afternoon, when it is steaming hot outside and stuck in 3rd world country traffic. Believe me, traffic and driving in 3rd world countries is very very different (to put it nicely). All that's better now with a good car with a/c. Another great blessing.

But all that's the blah blah about my comforts. Really not that important, other than you grow to miss things you had. And, in some ways those things you miss, you miss more as time goes on. At least for a season. At first, it's all adventure and you hardly think of them. But as time goes on and routines get set, you think about them more. So, car a/c and hot water have been perfectly timed gifts from God.

The boys are doing well. We all spent the weekend in the Rio San Juan area. (2 hours from Santiago, on the coast) I wanted them to meet some "country" boys. And meet they did. Actually interacted with them very well. Paul had brought the game Monopoly for us to play. Then for some unknown reason, and without the "country boys" even knowing we had it in the car, the Rio San Juan boys asked if we could play Monopoly. And I said, well, as a matter of fact, it's Paul's favorite game and we happen to have it in the car with us. So, that evening we scheduled a Monopoly game. And it was standing room only. We had to setup teams, so many kids in Rio San Juan wanted to play. I placed Marsil and Paul in charge of teaching them the rules, being banker, and distributing the properties. I sat back and watched, and dosed a little as it neared 11PM and the game was still not through!! But, it went well. No fights, no major arguments, just good times with kids enjoying the game. Good times. Good good times. And I was extremely proud of both Marsil and Paul how they helped the other kids keep the game light and fun.

Board games are so readily available in the US, but are a real treat here. Even for Paul and Marsil. When I got here, they (Paul/Marsil) didn't have Monopoly or any games, so I bought some as a way to engage with them more. And we've played Monopoly a lot. It is Paul's favorite game now.

But, the real story is..... I'm watching the kids play in Rio San Juan and I begin to think, "Wow, we really should consider leaving the game here with them." But I also think that would crush Paul. So, I put the thought aside.

Side note: I'm attempting to teach the boys how fortunate they are compared to many many Dominicans. That was part of the reason for the trip to Rio San Juan, as all the kids there live in basically shacks (at best) and have little education or little hope really. And few good parents, no fathers.... all the disadvantages.

As we're driving to church the morning after the big GAME (Paul and me by ourselves; others in another car), Paul asks me, "Norm, do you think we should leave the Monopoly game here for these kids?" It was one of those times when you get a "sign" that God is working. And, He's definitely working on Paul's heart. I pause for a moment (thinking, Wow God, you are amazing), and say, "Paul, I think that's something you'll have to decide." He says no more about it; he's just quiet for a while.

Fast forward to the time we're about to leave that evening to go home, and I ask him, do you want to take the game, or leave it here (in Rio San Juan). He says, "I want to leave it here."

To put this in context, not only does Paul love that game, but he loves us playing it together, its the only game he has (except checkers and cards), he loves winning at it, he knows it's a relatively expensive game (relative to DR incomes), and it has brought him many hours of joy. And for him to volunteer to give it away, without me prompting, was like this moment when the clouds part, and sun shines bright, and I think, okay, I think he's going to make it. Paul has demonstrated how big his heart really is.

I wonder if God calls me to give up things that mean a lot to me; joys I get through material blessings, but I somehow miss the calling. What would I give up that means a lot to me? What could I give up, on a relatively scale, that means the same as Paul giving his game to those boys in Rio San Juan?