When Your Best Isn't Good Enough PART 3

(Why 3 parts?; because this blog is just TOO LONG. So, I will break up these long posts to ease the reader's pain.)

My best wasn’t good enough to preserve a friendship with Paul & Marsil’s mother, Nidia. At least not for now. I look back and I’m not sure that I’m not trying to change someone who is who she is. More cultural lessons. The hard way.

Nidia is stubborn and willful and prideful. Which can be good and can be bad. And she’s also Dominican. Which can be good and can be bad. And saying and truly meaning, “I’m sorry” is something that, based on what I hear from others, is a rarity in this country. I cannot say that is my personal experience since this is the first time that I know of the need for someone to accept responsibility and some level of being sorry for their actions.

But, if all the above is true, what energy should be wasted on trying to explain why and how a misunderstanding and wrong actions all happened. And what could be done to heal beyond what was already attempted. And would the 2nd attempt to heal make things even worse than they are now. Is it now best just to walk away and say thank you for the great memories?

Nidia is still a good person and I have fond memories of her as a host when I was in Santiago. But to expect “changes” from her is truly unrealistic and possibly even unfair. She is who she is and she was born here, not the US, so I see, though I don’t like, where she’s coming from. I think it hurts her more and holds her back from many things, but I also don’t feel I’m the one to try to “fix” all that. So, I’m letting go.